Counterdependent

Being counterdependent is to take a position in relationships to ensure one is not dependent on others for emotional security status etc.

This can be managed through passivity or passive aggressive behavior or through more active rejection of authority figures or social mores that support interpersonal relationships.

Counterdependent people can reach the point where their self-identity arise from their acts of opposition and defiance and their behavior can be very disruptive, making it difficult for them to hold down jobs or maintain relationships of any kind.

From a psychodynamic viewpoint such behavior patterns are thought to result from a deep-seated fear of intimacy, which having lead to emotional isolation, is paired with an increased neediness for the feared state. This explains why counterdependents are sometimes locked into approach-avoidance conflicts in intimate relationships.